I don't know how I feel at the moment. I have so much on my mind. I hate how I feel like I can't just become friends with someone. Like me as much as I like you dawn it! I hate how dating isn't coming easy and I keep going back to the same person. That person is one of the biggest assholes ever. I hate that today was so FUCKING boring. I mean sure I got homework done but that was about it. I hate that I'm so negative all the time. I want a change and maybe this new semester will help but I want to change on the inside too. Maybe all my problems are my fault? Maybe instead of picking the insecurities of myself and others I should pick the positive out of myself and others. Maybe if I viewed everything positively nothing bad would really happen and my like wouldn't suck mondo balls as much as it does right now. Then maybe I could actually post a interesting blog blog instead of dumb listy paragraphy things. I don't know. I JUST WANT TO FEEL AMAZING I WANT TO HAVE AMAZING RELATIONSHIPS! I just want greatness. I feel like time is running out all of a sudden and as the hands move my life becomes grayer. My friends are great but I feel like I never see them anymore. I just want someone to enter my life and add color. I want someone new and interesting I can become closer with, make me laugh, have sleepovers, have fun. I can do that with my friends now and I'm still happy there in my life. But can I please just have a bit more spice? I'm good with schedule but I'm also good with change and that's what I want. Something different and new.
One thing that is new and my life is my new semester.
Well my new schedule at Northwest is:
|7:15 - 8:39||US History|
|8:44 - 10:08||Ceramics I|
|10:13 - 10:43||Intervention Period|
|Monday: 1st Period|
Tuesday: 2nd Period
Wednesday: 3rd Period
Thursday: 4th Period
|10:48 - 12:45||Spanish I|
2nd Lunch: 11:30 - 11:58
|12:50 - 2:15||Physical Science|
Its dumb. My classes are fine but all of them are pretty heavy on homework. I guess I'm glad I'm not doing ANY theatre this semester...its just odd. Plus the new intervention this is pointless. So...
1st Period: US History-
It's alright. So much work and a organized notebook which used to bug me SOOOO much but no longer does because they keep me organized. History has never been my favorite subject and there isn't really many people I get along with in there so that should be interesting. I'm dreading grouping up into partners. Also we have to do note card which I HATE! They don't help me study because I memorize by picturing the image in my head. Like in plays I just read the script in my head as I'm doing the play. Kinda complicated to explain but anyway. So note cards don't help me because I have to picture EVERY SINGLE note card in my head and it doesn't work. And she told us we have roughly 1,000 note cards this semester so...FMYLIFE.
2nd Period: Ceramics I-
Personally I think art classes are boring as shit but ceramics seemed different and I really like easy going class. I know a good amount of people in there and none I have problems with. There is a few interesting people in there like a Chinese, plump girl who is OBSESSED with cats. I short special girl that acts 8. My best friends twin.... basically everyone( I loved how I grouped Chessa's twin with that group, BAHAHA). But its Art so w/e. ANOTHER organized notebook.
3rd Period: Spanish I-
Yeahhhhhhhhhhhhh, I'm kinda late taking this class but whatever. My teacher is the biggest bitch EVER and I hate her...obviously. I'm really good at languages but HORRIBLE at saying ma'am. I hate saying ma'am and sir I think its dumb. I mean don't get me wrong I understand the point...doesn't mean it isn't dumb as shit. And you can't say "what?" because its negative...WHAT THE FUCK?! Ughhh, kill me now. OH!... and another organized notebook + a billion note cards and a girl that can never SHUT THE FUCK UP. and someone cried on the first day over drama in the class...this should be a ball.
4th Period: Physical Science-
I have a substitute in this class until spring break because my teacher had a baby. To make it better the sub has no fucking clue whats she talking about OR that she even had to take this class. She's really nice though and we can do basically what ever in it. I have a good chunk of friends in it but the rest are FUCKING IDIOTS.
Don't know anyone and we never do anything. Both times I have just sleep and this dumb bitch has never closed her mouth...UGH.
So far it's been good! I sit with all the preppy girls which doesn't really bug me at all. Friday a girl came up to me and complemented me on my blog! I LOVE YOU! I'm sorry I made you feel like a creeper! truly.
So yeah, that's about it!
Bye bye =]
ps: I sounded soooo negative and cursed A LOT...oh well.